His presence hit me like a rushing wind. I know some of you may not get into "this sort of thing" or maybe you've just never been in God's presence . Either way I kind of feel bad for you because you don't know what you're missing. Imagine the best "high" you've ever had in your life and then multiply it by a billion and it would still not scratch the surface of how amazing it is. Said all that to say it was as though I never left.
We were meeting my in laws there so we were looking to see where they were. Before I spotted them I noticed that the first 4 back rows were filled with the homeless from around New Orleans. I only glanced, at this point I could feel my heart strings tugging and I could feel myself welling up. It's as though God put a sensor in my heart that goes off every time I'm around the homeless and it doesn't matter what city I'm in. I'm connected but it isn't me, not really. It's Jesus' love for them that draws me to them. We started worshipping and I would glance for a few seconds and that would turn into staring. I couldn't keep my eyes off of them- my brothers and sisters.
God began to show me things. For instance, He let me know that He has not forgotten my desire for the disenfranchised in New Orleans, He put that desire there. Jesus shared with me how he felt about them .This is
what He said:
"All those who are houseless, make your home in me. Make your heart my home. I am so in love with you my beloved".
There was a song playing at the time and it repeatedly said "I'm in love with you, so in love with you" and Jesus was singing that directly to them. I don't know how to explain how I know that but I just do. I kind of saw /heard Him,very hard to put into words. I promise you I'm not crazy(that may not be totally accurate) but truth be told I don't care what anyone thinks as far as my relationship with God goes. You can either choose to believe me or not.
After that I looked at them and just broke down. The tears were coming and I just wanted to go over there and hug EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM! When the service was over they were all bussed back to wherever they were picked up and I just kept telling myself "I need to be here" , but God says otherwise, for right now anyway. God knows my desire to leave Lafayette better than I found it and not just for the homeless but all of Lafayette, spiritually speaking. I believe He is going to do a new thing here. A good thing here.
Pretty soon it will no longer be my job to find people shoes, socks, or shelter. Instead, I hope to help people find shelter in Him. I'm looking forward to that kind of freedom. I need this. I need to be apart from what the world does and be a part of what He does. He is really all that matters isn't He? I mean sometimes we can let working for God get to our heads and feel like we know what's best for His children better than He does, and I've struggled with that personally.
We really and truly don't have or possess any kind of power that He doesn't give us or allow us to have and I think if we're not careful we may force Him to remind us who's really in charge. It doesn't matter how many people I know or how much false humility I try to muster up, in the end He knows my heart and I'm accountable to Him and I can only hope that I never forget that every victory is through Him and for Him and ALL glory goes to GOD.
So many times I've wanted to turn my back and walk away. So many times I've wanted to give up and run away from what God's asked of me but then............ He pulls at my heart strings and I can't bring myself to refuse Him. Especially in His presence because in the secret place is fullness of joy, contentment, and trust.
In His presence I can love anyone. In His presence I can love beyond tolerance and hear beyond reason. In His presence I can see people through his eyes and love through His heart. In His presence I can be still. In His presence I can give Him anything He asks for because I fear nothing.
Thank you for sharing Lori. I've Missed your blogs! Love is enough. -Damla
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